First date safety tips
First date safety comes down to a plan made before you go: meet somewhere public, get there and home on your own, and tell a friend who you are meeting, where and when. A short video call beforehand confirms the person is who they say. Keep your home address and workplace to yourself at first, and agree a check-in text with your friend.
Why it matters: A simple plan lets you enjoy the date without second-guessing.
Steps
- Have a short video call before meeting to confirm the person matches their profile.
- Choose a busy public place you know, such as a cafe or a bar with staff nearby.
- Arrange your own way there and back; do not accept a pickup from home.
- Send a friend the person's name, a photo, the place and the time.
- Agree a check-in time and a code word that means call me with an excuse.
- Keep your drink with you, and order it yourself from staff.
- Leave whenever you want to; a polite thank you is enough.
Stop and call a professional if
- you feel threatened or someone will not let you leave: ask staff for help and call your local emergency number, 911 in the US
- someone you met online asks for money or pressures you to move the conversation off the app quickly: stop and report the profile
Common mistakes
- Sharing your home address or daily routine before you know someone.
- Relying on the other person for the ride home.
- Feeling you must stay to be polite when something feels wrong.
Teach this to someone
A one page sheet for showing a friend, a teenager or a parent: what to say, what to show, and one question to check it landed.
Teach: First date safety tips
What to say
First date safety comes down to a plan made before you go: meet somewhere public, get there and home on your own, and tell a friend who you are meeting, where and when. A short video call beforehand confirms the person is who they say. Keep your home address and workplace to yourself at first, and agree a check-in text with your friend.
What to show
- Have a short video call before meeting to confirm the person matches their profile.
- Choose a busy public place you know, such as a cafe or a bar with staff nearby.
- Arrange your own way there and back; do not accept a pickup from home.
- Send a friend the person's name, a photo, the place and the time.
- Agree a check-in time and a code word that means call me with an excuse.
- Keep your drink with you, and order it yourself from staff.
- Leave whenever you want to; a polite thank you is enough.
Where it stops
Stop and call a professional if you feel threatened or someone will not let you leave: ask staff for help and call your local emergency number, 911 in the US.
Check question
What confirms a match is who they say before you meet?
Answer: A short video call. Video is much harder to fake than photos or text.
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Related skills
Sources
This skill is general practice and draws on no single published source.
Written in our own words from the sources above. It is general information, not advice for your situation; where a professional, your doctor or your lease says something different, follow them.
Last reviewed . First published .